Don’t forget to vote in our CVille Burger Wars, CVille Beer Fight, RVA Beer Brawl and CVille BBQ Brawl.
We sat down with NYC’s premier authority on nightclubs and asked him to scope out some CVille clubs.
1. The Downtown Maul
Everything this club has: rabid dogs, chocolate covered bricks and a carousel made entirely of raw meat.
2. Streusel soX
Everything this club has: lederhosery, Christmas stockings with pictures of Steve Buscemi and PopTarts but everyone is mad about it.
Everything this club has: Thomas Jefferson jello wrestlers, The Declaration of Independence written in Cheezewiz and a Napoleon impersonator who’s clearly in the wrong place.
Everything this club has: human Spudnuts, prepubescent wine and a middle-aged man with sleep apnea.
Everything this club has: a banjo playing nun, smug philosophy majors and a teenager that knows everything.
Everything this club has: sriracha rum, a giggling tax accountant and tapas that are really just Ritz and motor oil.
Everything this club has: slam poetry performed entirely in tumblr posts, angry redditors and that one friend who pronounces it “JIFF.”
Photo: DMB FB
Everything this club has: DMB stands for Don’t Mention The Bartender. It’s a club where the bartender kind of looks like Dave Matthews but not enough that you would say anything.
9. Farm To Cable
Everything this club has: It’s just a dark room where you watch farm animals watch the Gilmore Girls theme song on a loop.
If you liked this post, you might also enjoy 9 Restaurants Your Mom Should Try In CVille and Top 9 Cocktail Hot Spots In CVille.
At Scoutology, we scout your city so you don’t have to. You’re going to love the Scoutology Network.
Maggie Comeau, Content Manager
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